Tales from the Teith…. Glossy Gleneagles

moira douglas main shotOh life has been very busy these last few weeks.  You will be glad to hear that further to my last blog things are drastically looking up on the job front.  I am quite exhausted. Last weekend I had the pleasure of spending the weekend at Gleneagles. You know, that little hotel up the road with the golf course.  It was my first time staying there. I would recommend it. Rather grand and glossy.  It was in celebration of the fact that Action Man and I have been married for 13 years.  His romantic words as he shook his head in wonder were ‘who would have thought we would have lasted this long’.  I completely agreed with him, it is nothing short of a miracle. Quite seriously, we have not threatened each other with divorce since as far back as April. He did mumble something about having enough paperwork to get through as it is.

At check in they offered to park our car.  I had just admired a red Ferrari as we approached the main entrance and we had parked next to a Bentley. The children were warned not to bash any doors or create any scratches.  I counted at least eight shiny black Range Rovers with personalised number plates.  Do they not come in other colours?  Needless to say the thought of subjecting somebody else with the job of parking our 9 year old banger which is putrid, stinks of wet dog and needs some serious bleaching was more than I could bear. We politely declined the kind offer.

Then they offered to carry our bags.  I looked at Action Man’s Army issue black hold all with his name written in white tippex.  I smiled sweetly and made a mental note that we really need to buy some smart luggage and in general get our act together if we are going to go out anywhere in public.  Action Man carried the bags.

Our suite was spacious with soft lighting, two televisions and a four poster bed. A radio was playing. We could not work out how to switch it off. Dressing gowns and  slippers were laid out.  I excitedly checked out the little bottles of shampoo, soap and shower gel along with stationery, postcards, a sewing kit and shoe shine. I struggled to find some Tetley teabags amongst the complimentary range of teas and coffees on offer. Lapsang souchong, cannot do it. It tastes of smokey bacon and ash.  We enjoyed the delicious complimentary fruit cake washed down with Scottish mineral water.

gleneagles 1Then it was off to the swimming pool and outdoor hot tub. The sun was shining. Oh so very pleasant. There are lovely dimmed lights in the ladies changing room that make you look ten times better than in real life. The main pool was like a bath. The changing rooms had under floor heating and you did not need to rake around to find £1 for the locker.

Breakfast in Gleneagles is a treat. The children were warned to be on their best behaviour. They were not to eat with their fingers, lick their knives, swing on the chairs or kick the table.  You can have caviar with your organic scrambled egg at breakfast for a supplement of £150.  I think this also involves champagne. I am fascinated by this; do people actually eat fish eggs and drink champagne in the mornings?   This would not be my first choice of hangover cure.

Life is really quite a joy at the moment with Action Man no longer weekly commuting and the unpredictability of Army life being a thing of the past.  After an Army networking meeting last week, Action Man has found himself with an unexpected job rather quicker than he expected.  He was quizzing me first thing this morning about what tie went with what shirt before rushing off to get the train.  Life was easier when he wore a uniform.

Moira Douglas

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